A new tactic has emerged that has the potential to even the playing field in a world where social interactions are often like a high-stakes game of psychological chess. Toxic behavior can be dealt with in novel and surprisingly effective ways, thanks to the “Tom Cruise Method,” which has gained widespread attention and been dubbed after its most famous proponent.
This technique, the therapists affirm, is inspired by an interesting story involving Hollywood star Tom Cruise which uses the effectiveness of questions to rebut insults and manipulation.
How Did The Tom Cruise Method Come About
Imagine being taken aback and publicly shamed but instead reacting with genuine curiosity. An intriguing version of this plot occurred in 2005 when Tom Cruise was subjected to an unexpected, rather audacious prank on the red carpet.
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A prankster dressed as a reporter sprayed water in Cruise’s face with a fake microphone to get a reaction that would go viral. What happened next, though, was a remarkably calm response that surprised everyone. Instead of exploding, Cruise asked the prankster several pointed questions.
“Why would you do that? What’s so funny about that? Do you like doing mean things?”
Instead of escalating into a shouting match, the confrontation became a fascinating discussion. Questioning is central to the Tom Cruise Method. The technique takes its cue from Tom Cruise‘s unconventional reply and relies on questions to address harmful actions.
Psychiatrist Dr. Nina Vasan stresses the power of questions as interrupters to break the destructive cycle of behavior. When making fun of another person, the goal is usually to make themselves laugh rather than to consider how the joke will land with the person being made fun of.
The Expert’s Insights on the Tom Cruise Method
In Cruise’s case, the prankster cared more about creating a show than respecting anyone’s personal space. Alyssa Mancao, a licensed psychotherapist, says that toxic people use constant insults and offenses to break down people’s defenses and control them.
“One of the reasons a toxic person aims to chronically insult and offend is to cut down the other person’s self-esteem. Over time, this allows them to gain control over the narrative, play mind games and manipulate,”
Using the Tom Cruise Method instead of getting into a fight over sensitive topics can turn a painful interaction into a boring interview with none of the desired drama. The Tom Cruise Method, like any other approach, isn’t a silver bullet.
The technique may have done wonders for the Hollywood star, but as the therapists suggest, it is subjective to everyone. According to Alyssa Mancao, the approach’s success is contingent on the honesty and sincerity of those involved. Meanwhile, psychologist Dr. Carolyn Rubinstein stresses the relevance of context.
Source: TikTok
